She stepped towards him, closing the distance between them, and reached out to pry his fingers off the pommel. He released it with an embarrassed sigh, but somehow ended up with her hand in his, their fingers interwoven. Her hand was cold, and he shuddered at the contact – but it wasn’t the temperature that got to him. He just stared at her, his throat tight, eyes prickling with an unfamiliar emotion.She didn’t say a word, just dragged him to the side, and after glancing surreptitiously around once, pulled him behind her through the opening of her tent. He hadn’t even noticed how close they were to the small pavilion he used to inhabit. He ducked his head as he went through the flap, looking up just in time to be blinded by the arcane lamp she thumbed on. She turned and pulled him into a tight hug, Leliana’s arms going around his neck, her fingers stroking his hair.He hugged her back by instinct; he wanted to push her away, to protect her by keeping her as far from him as he could. In fact, by the time they helped me bring my new clothes inside my houseand were saying goodbye, I felt comfortable enough to give both of them ahug.As they left, Alison whispered to me, "Before you go to bed tonight, youshould look up 'gender dysphoria'. It may give you something to thinkabout."After they left, I went to my computer, and fired it up. Because I spentall day looking at a computer screen, I rarely spent time online, but itdidnt take too long a search to find some articles, and moresignificantly, some interviews with people who suffered with a knowledgethat their true self did not match their presentation.I started by looking at people identified as female but who felt likemen, assuming that was what Alison was referring to, but, the more Iread, the more confused I got.I had none of the signs of a person who was unhappy about being a woman.Then I read some interviews with people who had successfullytransitioned, and reading about the ones who went from male to female,.
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